A common response from people once they learn I am a therapist is, “oh I tried therapy once and I didn’t like it.” I hear this response time and time again. Once I dig a little deeper, I usually find out what the person didn’t like was their particular therapist.

In my professional opinion, finding the “right” therapist, may be the single most important part of the therapy process. More important than the theoretical orientation of the therapist, what the office looks like or other factors a person considers when entering therapy.

The reason for this is, therapy often takes a bit of time and commitment. I am not saying you have to be in therapy for years but I am saying that it often takes more than a session or 2 or 3…to be helpful. If you don’t like your therapist you are not going to stick around long enough to reap the benefits from the therapy process.

So how do you do this, “find the right therapist?” I suggest, making appointments with at least 2-3 different therapists. Let them know when you are scheduling your first appointment that you would like to come in and see if they are a fit for you. This should not offend them, if a therapist if offended that you are interviewing different ones, I would beware and see this as a red flag. I encourage my new clients to come in and meet me, ask me questions and let me know how it feels after the first session. I tell my clients after the first session, don’t feel obligated to schedule another session if you aren’t sure I am the therapist for you, take a couple days and think about it if needed.

Another reason it’s important to find the right fit for you, is that a therapist is someone you are going to share tough stuff with. Often times people go to therapy to talk about something that they don’t really want to talk about but have realized they probably need to talk about.You need to feel comfortable enough to do this. Therapist styles are very different. Some therapists are very passive and quiet, others are more engaged and likely to give feedback. Do you prefer talking to a male or female, does age matter to you, how available is the therapist in between sessions, just to name a few things to consider when choosing your therapist.